Have you ever felt stuck in your life? Have you ever questioned your capabilities? Have you ever wondered what to do in your bewildering life and thought of “personal development”? I guess you did! We all did. At some point in our life, we reached a certain point of wanting to grow instead of escape.
Escape from reality is a defensive reaction involving the use of fantasy as a means of avoiding conflicts and problems of daily living. (Dictionary.apa.org)
Personal development refers to any activity you do to improve yourself, in areas that apply to your brain, mind, and heart.
Adults’ daily experiences are greatly influenced by a variety of elements, including their employment, neighborhoods, real-world encounters, and many more. Hence, personal development is a lifetime of commitment and awareness to keep up with the inherent ups and downs that life has to offer rather than a set calendar of adulthood.
Personal development doesn’t just mean enhancing our personal lives. It also pertains to professional growth and the actions you can take to advance your skills and career to become a more knowledgeable, effective worker. This could be reaching a significant business milestone, receiving the promotion you’ve been striving for, or taking efforts to hone your talents.
Here are four eye-opener expectations that you need to know before you undergo personal development.
Expectation #1: Life would be more Easier
Nope! Absolutely not. As long as we live, there will always be challenges. The readiness to accept challenges and overcome hurdles is what, if anything, distinguishes professionals from amateurs in any area of life. Professionals view them as a force that will strengthen, hone, and increase their value. If there’s one thing I’m certain of, it’s that the world will provide you with challenges. If you meet those challenges head-on and with an open mind and want to grow, you’ll start to adopt more of the next attitude.
The more you grow, the more you’ll be able to appreciate little things in life.
“Little things” is the new big. Our habits consist of many small actions. Our thoughts are made up of many tiny words. Our attitude and behavior are made up of small actions. Over time, small things develop and become more effective. The minor details we miss lead to the major ones.
Big is overrated. Bigger is better, according to the media. Bigger everything—bigger houses, bigger boobs, etc. We don’t always need bigger, and bigger isn’t necessarily better. A bigger house doesn’t necessarily make a home. “Bigger” can occasionally be a nightmare and a ton of extra work that is not essential.
Expectation #2: You Will Lose Friends
Really? Almost all of them? We see this quote occasionally in social media and many people are agreeing on this one! How about you? Do you agree?
This is not always the case. You can still mingle with your friends while you are growing personally. I repeat you can still mingle with your friends!
There’s really no such thing as “losing friends,” rather, it’s more like changing who you chat to and hang out with.
Friendship provides an avenue for support and counsel when individuals need help (Mora and Oreopoulos, 2011). Good friends provide an avenue to test qualities such as genuineness, honesty, and openness. It also promotes an avenue for tolerance for the weaknesses of others while learning to criticize constructively. Friendship possesses a unique platform that provides several dimensions to a relationship. The genesis of several friendships has not been well identified but has been fortified over time, providing several benefits that both parties enjoy and in some cases, trickle down to their family members (Bearman and Moody, 2004).
Friendships do have a sharp effect in many different ways. If you are surrounded by a network that is full of life and keeps active participation towards life and relations, then this will turn you too for living that way. (Sahil Thakur, 2021)
You’ll note that as you mature, your perspective on life and even social interactions changes, as does your thinking. “Anything is possible when you have the right people there to support you.” The saying goes pretty well when you have true friends in your life.
Expectation #3: Change Happens the Moment You Decide to Improve Yourself
Nope! Not right away. You will experience a tug of war within yourself before you give in to either doing the old ways (comfort zone) or pushing through the discomfort to achieve your personal goals.
Whether you like it or not, discomfort is always present in situations that are new to you. Struggles and hardships will battle against you. But! Do not be afraid. All these struggles will soon come to an end.
It can be exhilarating and frightening to change your life, but more than anything, it’s important if you want to advance. Most people eventually reach a point in their lives where they must make changes in order to advance personally or professionally, but knowing when to make those changes can be challenging.
The path to great success frequently begins with a spark or special moment. These are your pivotal moments, where you must make a decision that will profoundly influence the course of your life. Every ultra-high achiever remembers the precise times that influenced their life. Those possibilities will knock on your door, too, and you must decide whether to answer if you want to accomplish something extraordinary.
The hard times in life, and the tough situations prove to be difficult tests. But on the other side, is where the reward dwells, where the progress is to be had, and where the growth takes place. Getting there is the hard part, and working through the difficulties requires lots of strength, grit, determination, and perseverance. (Tanveer Naseer, 2022)
Expectation #4: Personal Development lets You Escape from Mental Illness
Many people have mental health concerns from time to time. But a mental health concern becomes a mental illness when ongoing signs and symptoms cause frequent stress and affect your ability to function.
A mental illness can make you miserable and can cause problems in your daily life, such as at school or work or in relationships. In most cases, symptoms can be managed with a combination of medications and talk therapy (psychotherapy). (https://www.mayoclinic.org/)
Personal development is NOT an escape from Mental Illness rather it’s a way of helping yourself to beat mental illness. Remember, there’s no battle to fight here. Undergoing personal development doesn’t mean fighting your mental illness and escaping from it. The latter’s goal is to HELP yourself overcome your mental illness.
Planning and strategizing play an important role in not just developing your skills but also presenting an excellent opportunity to boost your confidence and self-esteem.
Starting your preparation with an unclear mind or feelings of trepidation will lead to unclear goals and objectives. It is impossible to progress with self-development if feeling anxious or panic-stricken. Therefore, a good development plan starts with learning coping tactics that will help direct your efforts while allowing time for relaxation and adjustment.
A healthy mental state is essential for self-growth.
Included are a few tips to improve your focus and clear your mind:
- Exercise is an extremely beneficial and effective way to help relax your body and clear your mind.
- Practice breathing exercises
- Maintain a balanced diet
- Ensure your preparation plan leaves room for breaks during your practice sessions
- Voice your concerns and worries. Speak to a family member, a colleague, mentor or coach. (https://www.careersingovernment.com)
Conclusion
Personal Development is not a long-term goal but rather a decision and action to make every single day. It is a gradual action to make for you to achieve your goals in life. Just keep breathing and keep going and don’t rush everything. Enjoy the journey of your life. To change your life in any area, you must change yourself, not others or outside things. And the surest route to changing yourself is to know the Real You.
Quotes About Personal Development
“Personal development is the road to improving your personal self with its personality and all that goes with it. Your personality is but the mask you wear in the theater of life. Under the direction of your Higher Self, endeavor to develop the highest qualities of personality and to diminish the lesser.”—Tania Kotsos
“Be patient with yourself. Self-growth is tender; it’s holy ground. There’s no greater investment.”—Stephen Covey
“Personal development is the belief that you are worth the effort, time and energy needed to develop yourself.”—Denis Waitley